Completed Quotes

A taste of an Instagram account I started with famous quotes that apparently were shortened for posterity's sake

Full Account with exceedingly hilarious captions

 

Perfect for the germaphobe in all of us
Perfect for the germaphobe in all of us

 

 
Ten-Second-Tom has been put on notice
Ten-Second-Tom has been put on notice
It. Gets. Everywhere.
It. Gets. Everywhere.
Next time try not to be such a hipster...
Next time try not to be such a hipster...
Something tells me the burglar in your house isn't going to run away because you're fully loaded with love...
Something tells me the burglar in your house isn't going to run away because you're fully loaded with love...
Damn, no wonder he was such a badass prez. How can you say no to a Centaur?!
Damn, no wonder he was such a badass prez. How can you say no to a Centaur?!
If you've gotten stung by several bees you're technically an involuntary bee serial killer... Good luck sleeping tonight
If you've gotten stung by several bees you're technically an involuntary bee serial killer... Good luck sleeping tonight
When it comes to the ladies, Nic could use some guidance
When it comes to the ladies, Nic could use some guidance
The Tortoise and the Hare metaphor is not always applicable Kongzi... Short races, making love, chipotle servers, the list goes on and on.
The Tortoise and the Hare metaphor is not always applicable Kongzi... Short races, making love, chipotle servers, the list goes on and on.
Ol' BB is a warlock, a magician, and a Sith Lord all rolled into one. "They hate us cuz they anus." -Bill Belicheck. But you can't put a quote in the caption for a quote! 😱 Shutup, I do what I want.
Ol' BB is a warlock, a magician, and a Sith Lord all rolled into one. "They hate us cuz they anus." -Bill Belicheck. But you can't put a quote in the caption for a quote! 😱 Shutup, I do what I want.

Creative Writing Excerpts

Excerpts from creative writing pieces I have written recently

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Chili's

A social campaign for Chili's Grill and Bar for their "Endless Enchiladas" promotion

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Covestor

The Wikipedia page that I updated and edited for Covestor, accompanied by some spec ads for the service.

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Dunkin Social

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